Parody of the 2018-19 BATMAN DAMNED proving that even a low-budget publisher like Aardvark-Vanaheim can do a cheesy knock-off of Neil Gaiman's 1990 BOOKS OF MAGIC. All you need is a cast of mystery characters and a title character with 'Bat' in his name! BATVARK gets a new penis -- Michelangelo's David's penis, in fact! -- so he can 'Go Commando' and have the 'fine art defence' for legal cover. Our Mystery characters are FRANCIS ALBERT! JOE (THE JOKER IS WILD) E. LEWIS! FRACTAL GORDON SUMNER! COMMON BLOKE, ENGLISH! and THE WHORE OF BABYLON in fishnet stockings! Transitions that make absolutely no sense! Weird subtexts that seem to be about something else entirely! Fishnet stockings! The occult has never seemed more cliche-ridden! Well, that's not true -- think of all of the HALLOWE'EN MOVIE SEQUELS! BATVARK PENIS costs less than a single ticket to the last HALLOWE'EN SEQUEL. Look at it that way! 2 COVERS TO CHOOSE FROM: CENSORED AND UNCENSORED!.